A Blessing

It was clustered and packed; I somehow managed and grabbed a seat. I was in the metro, ladies compartment, wearing a patialla suit and a vermillion color little bindi on my forehead. After two stops, I got down and my eyes were searching for someone. There a little far off, I saw a lean, bald man waving at me. My face relaxed, I went towards him, grabbed his hand and went along with him.

Walking beside him was a feel of comfort, protectiveness and a kind of support which enhanced my persona from inside.

We walked a little ahead, checked out of the station, and went through the accelerator upstairs. 

There was noise all over; all along the way, shoulders crashing each other, things clustered booming together.

Since, I hate noise, my forehead was filled with lines but the touch and feel of that hand was supportive enough to make me calm. Walking down and moving outside the metro station was all changed, new stalls, confectionary shops, stylish outlets. I was wondering, where am I? The outlook of the place was completely new, the air seemed to be filled with freshness, not of air but of something mesmerizing, felt like liking the place though being crowded. It was a strange feeling. My eyes went here and there searching something I could catch and hold it in my arms. I was looking for something soft, cozy, actually a nice soft shawl for my dad. I could see across so many dupattas hanging with shining embellishments. Far off in a corner of a shop, I viewed some dark cloth pieces lying. I quickly moved my steps ahead, as if someone would grab them all. Eventually reached there, looked for a descent one and found a nice brown colored shawl. Asked for the price, my mouth went open like anything. Thousand bucks, “Oh! My God” I wondered what made it so expensive. Agreed, it was a beautiful shawl made of light fibre, soft, frizzle looking but the price exceeded my pocket size.

The best idea was just to bargain at the moment.

 I was about to bargain, immediately, the shopkeeper said, “eight hundred would be final, mam”. I was shocked, before I started bargaining further… “I said five hundred would be fine.” “No, mam, see the fabric, color, its hand woven, I can’t accept it for beyond eight hundred”. Taking two minutes, I gave it a thought and said to myself that it’s not a bad deal. I happily took out money from my purse and handed over to the shopkeeper. He grinned and took it immediately. His big smile, made me a little conscious, I felt as if I was cheated. But couldn’t react and felt as its better to take my stuff and move ahead. I was loitering around the shops, a hand tabbed at my shoulder. I looked back; my husband was standing with a furious face looking at me. “Where have you been? I have been searching you all around.” “Come; let’s move ahead, we are already late. Still in the dilemma for the price of the shawl, unknowingly, I followed him.

We hurriedly caught an auto and reached our destination.

As we reached our destination, there was huge entry gate in front of us. For me, it was the first time that I was visiting this place. My husband was a regular visitor of this place. For him this place was not merely a place to visit. It was a place where he found solace and inner happiness. The very first step of his on the ground; brought an instant smile on his face, a smile which was undying. I felt as if it was the first time he came to this place. His face appeared as a small child as if whose imagination or dream came true. I kept looking at his face with many questions in my mind. Not even looking at me, he simply grabbed my hand and started walking ahead. As we reached near the gate, a young, handsome guy came and stood in front of us. His outlook was very pleasing. His face showered kindness and calmness and his attire represented his depth and soundness of choice. Very gently he bowed and wished us, gave us a warm smile.

Again, he wished us and parted.

We walked ahead, crossing the barren land on the muddy pathway. Entered a small cabin, where a very strict seemed woman was sitting engrossed in her work or should be said piled up with work, I guess so far.  My husband gently knocked at the door, she looked up and said yes please. She smiled at us and gave us a form sort of paper to my husband. He began writing and in the mean while a young lady surprisingly handed over a numb, little doll in my arms of mine. I was in state of shock and the feel of that little one made my eyes shut, I touched her and hugged her to my chest. The water droplets rolled down my heart, throat and finally my eyes.

“It is my child”, and got with joy.

My husband was hiding his emotions but couldn’t and wept slightly. “The eight year long journey to day came to an end but with a new beginning.”

Tiny Tots

Tiny tots,

Here and there,

Making toys with paper tear.

A rabbit, a monkey, a dog and a deer,

All are there,

Just to amuse,

Here and there.

Rabbit hops and eats carrots in red,

And a dog is fed with milk and bread.

A monkey scratches and jumps,

Here and there.

Similar to a deer who also runs,

Here and there.

Tiny tots,

Here and there.

Glittery Drops

Slowly and steadily the drops roll,

Like the sky’s glittery dots troll.

If the falling stars could fulfill a wish,

Then these falling drops could certainly ask for some wish.

Those hollow and sorrow almond eyes,

Still remain the source of many sighs.

Can one imagine, what’s the fate of those?

Indebt longings,

Covered all around with slogging?

Or lending a way to cure one’s plight,

To make a life starry bright J

Can’t say why?

You are loved sometimes,

Cared sometimes,

Still a crave for someone is there.

Can’t say why?

Eyes look to and fro,

For that new beginning.

Can’t say why?

Why does love fades…

With the growing time and needs.

Can’t say why

Still the hope of being loved,

Is still there,

Deep within.

Can’t say why?

The hidden language of soul...

18th January'09, 4:40pm, I haphazardly got down of the rickshaw, stumbled a little and enquired guard at the gate of a public school, the way to my class. He looked at me with a puzzled expression as if he wanted to know that ‘what was I doing here?’ I frowned!! He showed me the way pointing towards the direction, but his puzzled face didn’t change at all. Ignoring him, but not really, his face expression was still on my mind, I hurriedly went towards the basement checking myself, my complete attire, my shoes, and my hair which somewhere I knew were not going to fit the place. But still, gathering my courage with loads of anxiety and excitement, I entered the basement… Yo!! drumm, drumm!! The sound touched my ears and mind, out went everything from my head, I was just walking towards the shut door which was at the end of the basement lobby. My heartbeat went a little higher; I stopped outside the door peeping in through the translucent glass. Fast beats of music was the only thing I could hear with a grinning smile on my face. The beats of music were not familiar to me, in fact it was altogether a different style of music comparing to what I generally listen but somehow I felt that my whole body was responding to the rhythm of music.

I opened the door; around thirty people in front of me were dancing to their best. I got nervous and puzzled, wanted to say something but couldn’t.  A lean, short boy came to me, I showed him my id card and was about to say something but instead he politely asked me to wait outside for the next session!! The whole scene appeared to me as if a shy kid was entering a big unknown world.

I went towards the back wall and stood there with its support, thinking… and then soon coming back to my senses and realising that I am a confident being ;)

After few seconds, a tall guy dressed completely in black from head to toe was standing in front of us (there were few more people waiting for the session to begin but their state of mind was fine, they were in their senses, unlikely like me :P). He took our introduction and began the revision of last class. I wasn’t there in the last session; this was my first introductory class. But I didn’t inform the trainer about it; don’t know why, I think it’s always been there within me to challenge up myself, to compete with my existing level… Around four years back I joined this academy but unfortunately couldn’t continue it after three months. So after these many years somewhere down in my heart, I felt as if my present stamina and yearn to learn wouldn’t match my years back energy, enthusiasm and desire. And this action of trying to cope was a way to judge.  

With a little fumble here and there, I somehow managed while the other new joiners with the other trainer were trying their best but their struggle seemed to be an ongoing one. I was full of pride and self admiration, adding more to it, our main instructor, a short and peppy girl, a dancer cum stylist :P complemented me for one of my steps, adding to my confidence and gradually all my inhibitions flew away… it was then just me and my soul responding to the beats of music and introducing me the hidden language of my soul.

Shattered Heart

I am shattered from deep within.

The thought of one that made my smile wide,

Now narrows down on just a thought of his perspective towards my life.

I am shattered from deep within.

I cried on his shoulders,

For nothing but some support.

But in return, my faith was ruined,

With his entire mighty jolt.

I am shattered from deep within.

I thought, his love was mine,

But was nothing more than an insecure gesture.

I was heading along with him towards my dreams,

But realized lately,

That he was the one to fade them completely.

I am shattered from deep within.

The trust again, will never be gained.

It was a fairy tale, which will never be accomplished again.

I am shattered from deep within.